Travelingjenny

A friend recently sent me an article from a 1955 issue of Good Housekeeping magazine, entitled: “The good wife’s guide.” This seems to have been intended as a sort of primer on how a housewife should behave upon her husband’s arrival home from work. Clearly, I would have been an absolutely terrible wife in 1955:

*Have dinner ready. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs.
Actually, dinner is the carrot that I dangle in front of him so that he actually comes home right after work. Besides, I need him to keep his energy up so that he can help me keep my sanity for another two hours until the girls go to bed.

*Gather up schoolbooks, toys, papers etc then run a dustcloth over the tables.
Excuse me, a dustcloth?? I’m pretty sure I don’t have one of those.

*Prepare the children. They are little treasures… Minimize all noise.
Sorry, it is simply impossible to keep the “little treasures” quiet as they literally bounce off the walls, and sometimes off each other, and whine excessively about how hungry they are.

*Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
If I do that, he won’t be able to actually hear me (see above).

*Be happy to see him.
No problem there. I am always ECSTATIC to see him walk through the door. In fact, I can hardly contain the urge to give him a bear hug and dance a happy jig before I push him aside and run out the door to my car for a fast getaway.

*Remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
While I find his work endlessly fascinating, I cannot even imagine a parallel universe where a discussion about marketing to truckers is more important than a discussion about why there are Band-Aids stuck to the floor.

*Remember, he is the master of the house… You have no right to question him.
Sorry people, I think we all know who the master of the house is. And even though she’s only four, she doesn’t like to be questioned, either.